Post relapse positives

I cannot say that I am glad I relapsed, of course not, it was a really hard couple of months, a lot of  tough emotions and bad times. That being said in the last few months I have realised that there have been positives changes in my life because of my relapse and it has changed things like my mindset and outlook on life for the better.

How I get my gym on!

I know I have posted about the gym before but that was more about exercise classes in general and I hadn't really had the best experiences in an actual gym setting before.

I wanted to post about the gym again as I have recently had a very positive experience in a great gym on the Wirral, called Zone Fitness and am even thinking about joining.

Ok so if have read my 100 days of happy posts I mentioned I have been going to this gym because my friend got me 2 weeks free membership there for Christmas. At the time I did not realise what a great present this actually was.

So I have sadly come to the end of my 2 weeks trail and I am so glad I went along and may even join the gym properly when I sort my money out.

Back on track

I have been off the fitness waggon for some time now due to a number of different factors in my life. When I finished university I started my first and most stressful job. This did not make me feel like dieting or keeping fit at all. I am now in a great job as a one to one teaching assistant at a local school and much happier for it.

The next factor was losing my Rosemary Conley health and fitness club. When it finally packed in I stayed with my local group for awhile until that became a bit much. So for a while now I've been trying to go it on my own but not really getting very far. I made a book with a before photo and weight to get me started. Then I added pictures of my goal to go on a amazing holiday abroad and look fab in my sexy swim wear. I weighed myself each week at boats and tracked what I ate on a phone app called "My fitness pal." I lost motivation after awhile and found sweets and fast food were just too good. On my own I had no one to swap ideas with, no one to share their motivational stories with me and it was just too hard doing it on my own.

Next step I knew I needed to join a group I wouldn't be able to get the exercise like with Rosemary Conley but I would get the support. I started looking into the different ones debating which I should join when my Aunty said she wanted to join a new group too. She had heard the with Weight Watchers people lose the weight and keep it off more than with other weight loss groups.

Make that change... NOW

Too long I have been putting this off, feeling like I am past the point of no return. Waiting til Monday to start the diet again. NO MORE!!!

I am making a change and I am making it now!

I work in a school so last week was half term and its been quite a productive half term too. Been on some killer dog walks (didn't kill the dog just me), I have sorted out an exercise room that I am quite proud of and hope to get a lot of use out of. I've made my normal bike a exercise bike with a stand so I have no weather excuses for not using it. Got a stepper off my mum a while ago which I hope to use more like at all would be a good start. We are also hopping to get a treadmill which is not to be used instead of walking the dog of course. But until then there is plenty of space to dance around like a mad woman and lose weight that way.

No huMAN is an Island!

This is another post were I want to highlight that sometimes mental fitness comes before physical fitness. Cure the mind before the body.



Too long I have been keeping stuff in, not sharing my biggest problems with people. Thinking I can handle it as I get further into my overdraft, worry about failing at my job and stressing about most day to day things on my own. I need to let people in!



I want to get this message across that no one is an Island!



People call me shy, quiet and nice. But they don't realise that I am quietly troubled. I don't share my opinions or tell people what I am struggling with, when I could. I feel like this makes it easier and keep to myself and try to deal with all my issues on my own. I don't like to admit to my mistakes or admit when I need help which makes things very difficult and I spend ages catching u on jobs. Does anyone else do this?



So last week it all became too much and I realised I need to make a change! I realised this too late and now I feel a bit overwhelmed but it's not to late to say from now on I am going to share my problems and let people in!!!

I didn't achieve anything by keeping it all in!

I expect people to know that I am upset but people think she hasn't said anything is wrong so she must be fine.

Do I want people to be mind readers?

Some people can read the tone in your voice but not many especially not if they have their own problems going on. You need to speak up and tell them your not ok and explain what's wrong!

I want to vow to never say one thing and mean another! Who is with me?

Getting well and staying well

My bipolar can be controlled by tablets but it is something I have to live with, try to control and manage everyday like many other people it's a daily battle. I just try to concentrate on one day at a time, live in the moment and not worry to much about the future or regret the past. This can be easier said than done at times.

When I got home from my last hospital stay professionals and my family were happy that I had been well for a good amount of time and was on the road to recovery. I however had my doubts, I was worried about going low and slipped back into the bad habits of my low mood. It was only when I was completely honest and opened up about my worries that I could get others help and advice on how to stay well.

Sometimes I still feel low and unmotivated first thing in the morning: this was the hardest part of the day for me when I was low as I didn't want to face the day ahead.

https://www.mqmentalhealth.org/news-blog/post/how-does-exercise-impact-mental-health

Songs of october

 Song a day for a month

 31 songs for each day of songs of October. Themes mental health awareness, happiness and joy. Starts on Thursday.